It is often difficult for people to understand why a rape victim would ever protect his or her rapist. This is an incredibly complex and sensitive subject – as nuanced as the survivors themselves. There is no one-size-fits-all explanation for why rape victims shield their rapists or protect perpetrators. Studies have shown several common reasons behind this occurrence.
Fear or Intimidation
Rape victims are frequently silenced by fear or intimidation tactics that are employed by their rapists. Whether the assault was perpetrated by a stranger, acquaintance or friend, the victim may have felt like his or her life was in danger during the rape. In many cases, this fear lingers after the attack and scares victims into silence. In other scenarios, the rapist may threaten to hurt or kill the victim if he or she speaks up.
Social Stigmas and Shame
Unfortunately, rape victims may be silenced by fear of negative social stigmas. Victim-blaming, for example, may discourage a survivor from coming forward – especially if the perpetrator is someone well-known or liked in the community. Many victims experience a great deal of shame, guilt, self-blame and embarrassment that can prevent them from coming forward. Sadly, many victims are in a vulnerable position and may not feel empowered enough to tell their stories and face potential backlash from society.
Trauma Bonding
If a rape victim had any type of relationship with the rapist, this can lead to extremely complex emotional attachment issues that interfere with reporting the crime. Trauma bonding is an emotional attachment that can develop from a cycle of abuse followed by positive reinforcement. This phenomenon can make it very difficult for the victim to leave an abusive relationship.
Being raped by a trusted individual, such as a family member or intimate partner, can make it harder to report the abuse. If the rapist is someone the victim knows or cared about, the victim may be concerned about what will happen to the rapist after reporting the attack to the police. The victim may feel guilty reporting the crime, or may desire the assailant to go to therapy rather than face jail time. This can get in the way of the victim reporting the rape.
Power Dynamics
An imbalance of power is common in sexual abuse and rape scenarios. An adult or individual in a position of power over a target may abuse this power to commit sex crimes and silence the victim. This dynamic can make it harder for a victim to report abuse. The victim may fear retaliation, such as the loss of a job, or be too afraid to confront a powerful abuser. A teacher forcing a student to engage in nonconsensual sexual activity is an example of a power dynamic that can be difficult for a victim to overcome.
Denial
In some cases, a rape victim copes by denying that the rape ever took place. Denial or refusing to acknowledge that rape occurred is a common coping mechanism in the emotionally traumatized. Acknowledging the rape means coming to terms with it, which may be too difficult for the victim to do. Denying the attack may also stem from a desire to reframe the assault. This is more common when the rapist and victim are in a relationship or have an emotional bond.
There is no “typical” way for a rape victim to respond to sexual assault. There are many complex reasons why a victim may feel the need to protect his or her rapist. Sexual assault cases should be approached with empathy and understanding of the unique challenges that a survivor faces. Encouraging survivors with an environment of support and no judgment can help them feel safe enough to speak up and seek help, whether it’s from a friend, family, a sexual abuse lawyer, a therapist, or anyone they seek comfort from.